### Introduction When 2+2 = 10 - Status management is interaction - Who is in charge? - Where do I fit in? - Stand shoulder to shoulder and work together - Experiment and take risks - Is it okay to criticise ### Skill 1 Build Safely ### Chapter 1 Good Apples - Creating a safe environment that is solidly connected. Foundation for a strong culture. - Belonging cues are behaviours that create safe connection in groups - proximity, age, contact, energy, mimicry, turn taking, attention etc. Have three qualities - Energy - Investing in the exchange - Individualisation - Treating the person as unique - Future orientation - Signal continuity of relationship - Five measurable factors of team performance - Everyone talks and listens roughly the same amount - Members maintain eye contact and conversations and gestures are energetic - Members communicate with each other and not just the leader - People carry on back channel side conversation - Members periodically break, go exploring outside the team and bring information back to share - Group performance depends on behaviour that communicates that we are safe not words. Words are often noise. ### Chapter 2 The Billion Dollar Day When Nothing Happens - Google story. Culture of belonging safety lead to a billion dollar idea. Hockey games where everyone was an equal, the team meetings on Friday contribute to this culture. - A company has to feel safe, be connected and have a future for all its members. ### Chapter 4 How to Build Belonging - Highly successful cultures aren't always happy and lighthearted. They are energised and engaged and solve hard problems together. Candour, uncomfortable truths are important. You can give feedback by also keeping in mind these things - You are part of this group - This group is special and has high standards - You can reach those standards - Using larger context to provide perspectives. Pop gets his players to connect on things outside of basketball like Syria or something. ### Chapter 5 How to Design for Belonging - Collisions - serendipitous personal encounters - are the lifeblood of an organisation. Hsieh goal of 1000 collisions every year. - Clusters of high communicators = completely depended on one factor distance between desks. Visual contact can be more important than we think. ### Chapter 6 Ideas For Action - Over-communicate that you're listening. Head tilted, slightly forward, eyes unblinking, eyebrows arched up, leaning towards speaker. Try not to interrupt pause and take turns smoothly. - Spotlight your fallibility early on - to create safety open up, show you more mistakes and invite input. - Embrace the messenger - appreciate the feedback when it comes - Preview future connection - connect dots between where team is and where they are headed - Overdo thank yous - helps to affirm the relationship. Pop thanks players for allowing him to coach them. Thinking ignites cooperative behaviour. - Be painstaking in hiring - Zappos offers $2000 to trainees if they quit. - Eliminate bad apples - Create safe collision rich spaces - Make sure everyone has a voice - no meeting can end without everyone sharing something. Do one on ones. - Pick up trash - leaders doing menial work models the team ethic of togetherness and teamwork. Sends a larger signal that we are all in this together. - Capitalise on threshold moments - you can really send a belonging cue in such moments. Think of the Wipro experiment. - Avoid sandwich feedback - learning focused dialogue about needed growth and clear bursts of recognition and praise - Embrace fun ### Skill 2 Share Vulnerability ### Chapter 7 Tell Me What you Want and I'll Help You - Short burst communications - notifications; not an order or command - provides context - putting the spotlight on one distinct element or word. - Brain trust - creating moments of discomfort. At Pixar Film director watches movie with veteran directors and producers and offer candid opinions. Dissects movie in detail and analyses the flaws. Similarly after action review at Navy SEAL ### Chapter 8 The Vulnerability Loop - Vulnerability sparks cooperation and trust. It sends a signal that you have a weakness and that you could use help. Study with give Soup Game clearly shows link between vulnerability and cooperation ### Chapter 11 How to Create Cooperation With Individuals - Roshi Givechi - IDEO questions to help improve - The one thing that excites me about this opportunity is - I confess, the one thing I'm not so excited about with the opportunity is - One the project, I'd really like to get better at These questions designed to connect to deeper emotions - fear, ambition and motivation - Concordances happen most when there's one person talking and the other person listening. Easier to connect when you don't have to think of what to say. ### Chapter 12 Ideas for Action - Make sure the leader is vulnerable first and often. Ask three questions: - What is one thing that I currently do that you'd like me to continue to do? - What is one thing that I don't currently do frequently enough that you think I should do more often? - What can I do to make you more effective? - Over-communicate expectations - Deliver the negative stuff in person - When forming new groups, focus on two critical moments - first vulnerability and first disagreement. - Listen like a trampoline - Interact in ways to make the other person feel safe and supported - Take a helping cooperative stance - Occasionally ask questions that gently and constructively challenge old assumptions - Make occasional suggestions to open up alternative paths Sometimes you should build on the first response to get to the underlying problem - Resist the temptation to reflexively add value. Make suggestions after a scaffold of thoughtfulness. - Use candour generating practices like AAR/Brain Trust - What were our intended results - What were our actual results - What caused our results - What will we do again - What will we do differently - What challenges can we anticipate - What have we learned from similar situations - What will make us successful this time - Aim for candour not brutal honesty. Feedback that is smaller, more targeted, less personal and equally impactful can maintain a sense of safety and belonging. - Embrace discomfort - Align language with action - Build a wall between performance review and professional development. One is judgment, other builds on strengths and growth. - Use flash mentoring - Make the leader occasionally disappear ### Skill 3 Establish Purpose ### Chapter 13 - Coming up with a credo or a set of values as a framework for decision making. J&J story of Tylenol crisis. - What do we stand for? Create simple beacons that focus attention and engagement on the shared goal. - Mental contrasting - picture goals and obstacles to the goal very vividly - Need to show why do we work and where you should put your energy ### Chapter 14 Hooligans and Surgeons - Five signs of successful teams - Framing - Roles - Rehearsal - Explicit encouragement to speak up - Active reflection ### Chapter 15 How to Lead for Proficiency - You have priorities whether you like it or not and it's better to name them. Also name the behaviour that support these priorities. - Create engagement around a simple set of priorities that can function as a lighthouse orienting behaviour. ### Chapter 17 Ideas For Action - Name and rank your priorities - Be 10 times as clear about your priorities as you think you should be. Leaders thought 64% of companies could list priorities but finally only 2% really knew. Create conversations that encourage big questions. What are we about? Where are we headed? - Figure out where your group aims for proficiency and where it aims for creativity - Proficiency - Clear accessible models of excellence - High repetition, high feedback training - Build vivid, memorable, rules of thumb - Spotlight and honour fundamentals - Creativity - Attend to team composition and dynamics - Define reinforce and protect team autonomy - Make it safe to fail and give feedback - Celebrate hugely when initiative is taken - Embrace the use of catchphrases - Measure what really matters - Use artifacts - Focus on bar setting behaviours